Saturday, July 29, 2006

Mother Nature pays a visit to Squirrel Queen

When your small swimming pool becomes a haven for tadpoles, you know things have gotten just a bit out of hand. That was the case with my nieces' pool. A lovely shade of green with black future frogs flitting around in what I'm now referring to as Walden's pond.
I snapped a couple of pics of the little swimmers lurking under a huge tree limb, a.k.a. log, that's floating in there this afternoon, but the lighting didn't help me out much.
The evening cacophony coming from the newest pond in town is amazing. Croaks and chirps abound. Last night I grabbed a flashlight when I took the dogs out for an evening sabbatical and spotted several froggies a courtin' on the inflatable ring at the top of the pool.

Then tonight, Newscoma's arachnaphobia kicked in as she nearly walked into a good-sized spider spinning its web for the evening just before sundown. It was then I figured I'd continue my nature-themed photo run with some shots of said spider prepping for an evening's meal of moths and insects.
Later I was taking my niece out to look for early frogs in the "pond" when we came across the monster beetle squiring its way across the deck. That thing is gi-normous. I recscued it out of a bucket of water a couple of weeks ago. If not that one, then its first cousin. The thing is at least a couple of inches long.
Next freak I spotted was the slug. For some reason these things fascinate me. At another place I lived, we had some whoppers in the backyard. Python sized, I'm telling you. This one was just a wee little slimy thing despite its enourmous appearance in the pic.
Finally I got a gander of another web and its host.
I was like Marlin Perkins out there with my own little Mutual of Omaha Wild Kingdom episode tonight.
For those of you who remember the show, here's a little Wild Kingdom flashback for you. If you're too young to remember it, go see why TV junkies recall Marlin and Jim so fondly.
Here are the best of the nature pics I took tonight posted on my Flickr site.

Swami Serena says ...

Leo - On Saturday, the answer is spelled out for you in your AlphaBits. Look to the cereal. For luck Monday, avoid left-handed people. Wednesday will take a turn for the better if you keep a mitten tucked in the toe of your shoe.
Virgo - The stars shine down upon a new venture involving Styrofoam on
Saturday. Monday means more hard labor. Don¹t forget to bring your
pickax with you. A neighbor is in need on Wednesday. Cross the line and offer
a helping hand.
Libra - The scales tip in your favor on Sunday. Enjoy being on the high
side while it lasts. For luck on Monday, take a new path on a familiar trip.
Wednesday a phone call creates questions.
Scorpio - An angry fast food worker must be avoided
on Sunday. Tuesday¹s main topic will be television. Wear your bunny ears
or you¹ll be in Jeapordy.On Thursday, a whiff of corruption surrounds a coworker¹s
conversation. The nose knows.
Sagittarius - Feel free to express yourself on Saturday. The right people
will be listening. Monday, your lucky number is equal to 58 times the number
of people who say to you, ³Have a nice day.² Wednesday a loved one
explodes. Be ready to help clean up the fallout.
Capricorn - The Goat will be in serious need of a hug on Satursday. A
phone call between 12:19 p.m. and 1:13 p.m. brings good news on Monday. It¹s
not a milk mustache, but the solution you¹ve been looking for is right under
your nose on Tuesday.
Aquarius - Spread your wings on Saturday. Take flight and soar. You¹ll
find a gold star by your name on Monday. Good job. Wednesday, a household
issue erupts. Be ready to wield your plunger like a jousting knight uses his
Pisces - Spend time in the great outdoors Sunday. Get back down to
earth. Monday will sail by thanks to help from coworkers. Give them a pat on
the back. Wednesday, an encounter with an angry Yeti could lead to
injuries. Keep the Bactine handy.
Aries - Don¹t fake it on Saturday. Let your true emotions be known.
Sunday a romantic notion should be encouraged. Fling aside prejudice on Wednesday.
Get to know that person and you¹ll learn more about yourself.
Taurus - Your lucky number on Saturday is equal to the number of magnetic
ribbons you spy divided by 4,370. Sunday, you hear the siren song of
the cool waters. Heed the call. Don¹t be blinded by the bling on Tuesday.
Look beneath the shiny surface.
Gemini - Saturday avoid a cat fight. Catnip can soothe the beasts.
Monday, build a moat around your desk area and defend your station from angry
invading mobs. Wednesday, the planets align to help you set sail on an
internal journey. Rediscover you.
Cancer - For luck on Sunday, answer your phone on the eighth ring.
Monday will be safe for neither man nor beast. Wednesday, in a hectic day,
take a moment for yourself.

Friday, July 21, 2006

An arm and a leg

Finally, a gas station with a sense of humor in Rochester, New York. They actually put on their sign, instead of numerical prices, ARM and LEG.
Honesty in advertising is so rare.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Inappropriate/Appropriate Bush/Merkel

Inappropriate vs. Appropriate.
After munching and mumbling on muffins slack-jawed while dropping "meadow muffins" into his candid conversations, the "Great W" has now made another faux pas.
Bush's "European Vacation" continues to provide Letterman, The Daily Show and Colbert enough fodder for a year of late night laughs.
In a G-8 meeting, he gave German Chancellor Angela Merkel an uninvited neck rub.
What a total disrespect for her. Yes, they may be friends (they did share a roast pig lately), but in a room full of powerful men, did his act undermine her authority in the eyes of others on hand?
For me there is a great issue here. Would he give a neck rub to buddy Tony Blair or Putin or any other world leader in a crowded room. Doubtful. To me this shows his disregard for public decorum. It was a mysoginist act. At least he didn't ask her to bring her muffin recipe to the next meeting. Wait, let me rephrase that, "hopefully" he didn't ask for her muffin recipe.
As a woman who works in a male-dominated field, I certainly see how W's actions could have future ramifications. In front of leaders of nation's where women are already subjugated and dismissed, such an act could rip apart what credibility Merkel has worked hard to build.
It is acts such as these that make me wonder anew at his social ineptitude.

Pug Bowling is much funnier than Squirrel Bowling

While surfing about a million "Big Lebowski" links thanks to Kat Coble's post yesterday I eventually worked my way to this little ditty.
There's nothing like a little flamenco version of "Hotel California" combined with pugs and bowling to get you revved up for another day.

Squirrel Dancing Queen

I seem to be in a dancing mood as a certain theme has run through my last few posts (thanks Abe).
I neglected to add "Where the Hell is Matt" in my earlier post so I thought I'd post again and add some other heel,toe,shuffle moves to this post. After watching his video a couple of times, I've decided he's modeled his moves, not on Fred Astaire, but Uncle Jed from the Beverly Hillbillies.
Apparently, Matt has inspired many to create their own videos you can find at youtube.
There are nearly 100 videos inspired by his around the global shuffle.
Here's just one set here in our beloved Volunteer State. I don't know the stars, but my hat's off to them. Enjoy and take some time to dance today.

Monday, July 17, 2006

Freakin Lincoln

Oh, we've all seen those dancin' Ws and funky Gores, but how about an honest Abe getting his freak on!
Now that's good Presidentiary action, if you ask the Squirrel Queen.
Dick Clark, who as I understand it was a schoolboy chum of Lincoln's back in Illinois in the day, would be so proud. This is worthy of the original American Bandstand.

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Zidane vs. the Squirrel Queen

The Squirrel Queen saw the head butt heard round the world live last week. Since then the Internet has been buzzing with folks putting Zidane's forehead to good use.
Play along and remember, the Squirrel Queen says, "Always be a good sport."

Dancing around the world

The Squirrel Queen is so jealous! She so wishes she could pack her dancin' shoes and hitch a ride on a steamer or a hot air balloon or the Concorde and travel around the globe over the next 80 days to show off her mad movin' skillz in exotic locales.
However, the Squirrel Queen is afraid of needles and thinks she might need a whole lot of extra shots to get across the border into some of these countries. Maybe she'll just watch the video again instead.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Hot Rod Hoakum

Having watched an hour of killer ants (the real ones, not the ones that terrorized Joan Collins) on the Discovery Channel, the Squirrel Queen moved on to greater fare.
I'm now spending a couple of hours with some hot rod hooligans and the family they torment in "Hot Rods to Hell".
Classic stuff, this. Teens in button down shirts and dresses with patterns worthy of Laugh In-era Ruth Buzzi (and these are supposed to be the rough and rowdy kids) terrorizing a nuclear unit on the road.
Is it possible this film is what doomed Route 66, scaring travelers from "getting their kicks" on the famous highway? Me thinks not.
These taunting teens and their bodacious wheels appear to be about as threatening as a Care Bear on qualudes. The panicky mode of the family's father has an explanation in the movie's opening moments. He's sort of a high-strung type, as in nervous breakdown in the breakdown lane.
Here's another T-bird-riffic review of these caustic car-drivin' kids and their hot rod hysteria.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

hot dog heaven or petrified hot dog

After Newscoma posted her lovely little tale about crazy cat lady sisters dissing their deceased mom in favor of a passel of pussy cats, I found this little ditty about a pair of pranking siblings who shared an obsession with a petrified hot dog.
The closest my family comes to this odd item-swapping phenomenon is a three-inch rubber flashlight shaped like a fish (the pocket trout) that is rotated from person to person as a Christmas present from year to year.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Einstein Casanova


It appears that Albert Einstein had more than science on his mind.

Letters written by the genius indicate that he was quite the ladies' man, rebuking prior information.
The letters, released by a family member upon the 20th anniverseray of her death, indicate the Gene Simmons pose above may have revealed why he was so popular with the chicks.
I'm guessing maybe his brain wasn't his best physical attribute.

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Ninja cousin

The Squirrel Queen found a video of a talented cousin. The Ninja Chipmunk kept a feline foe at bay with its fearsome flipping and face-to-face bravado.
The Squirrel Queen has yet to divulge all her flippin' sweet moves.
Bruce Lee would be proud.


Art, design and activism come together in an attempt to end hunger.
Cool pics of three dimensional displays created entirely from cans and boxes you see on your regular trip to the market.
There's a slideshow of a variety of entries.
Don't miss out on the winners from the last four years. They can be found under the header "Competitions" on the home page.
Pretty cool visions for a good cause.

Friday, July 07, 2006

The Squirrel Queen picked up the WKRN Channel 2 signal beaming into the NashVegas sky and flew in to the big city from all the way out in Podunkville for a meeting of blogging minds.
An amazing time.
I know I'll forget to mention some of the folks that I met last night and will have to do muy mea culpas to make up for it.
Thanks to all who asked about my recovery from my recent gastric distress. I believe I'm fully recovered. And thanks to the Channel 2 folks for inviting me in the first place.
The list of memorable moments is long and yet I'm sure I didn't remember something that is oh-so-worthy of being included here.

Sista Smiff and Newscoma chatted about Country Music Hall of Fame tour guide memories.
CeeElCee and I expounded upon home brewing, road tripping and canines.
Kathy T and I palavered about wood-grained carpeting, squirrels tossing nuts, tossing our cookies, Girl Scout cookies and naming schools after Oprah Winfrey.
* Got to hear house-hunting horror stories from Daily Diablogger while Jag pitched in with her own interesting tales of visits to the homes of folks trying to unload an abode that involved poo and porn.
* Rex L. Camino was a cool retro breeze through the Nashville air. I'm sure he thought our recounts of local West Tennessee alien abductions and gigantic produce seemed farcical, but they were all true. True I tell you.
* Huck and Rex were the first bloggers we met. Huck kept everyone on an even keel while staying above the fray. Interjecting as needed to keep things rolling.
* Stephen King was just one of the topics Kat and I made yakkety yak about.
* TV on the Fritz was a delight and even offered an invite to a friend's gig after the blogger blab. Thanks for the extended hand. Next time we might take you up on it.
* I do regret not getting to talk about Bull Terriers with Aunt B. Maybe next time we can discuss the hard-headed hounds.
* Newscoma doing a Ringling Brothers worthy flip of a hops and barley beverage bottle off the bar and making a splash without drowning those encircling her in order to hear her magical motivational brilliance (did I lay it on too thick there, nah) during a discussion of drive-by Waylon Jenning spottings and the Dempseys.

It was quite a night and quite a display of overall brilliance by those in attendance.
Again, thanks for the invitation and the hospitality from everyone.
I'll keep my squirrel eyes focused on the sky in order to pick up the next Channel 2 signal sent into the ether.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

"King of Enron" Conspiracy Theory or the Halliburton Witness Protection Program

Being a fan of conspiracy theories at heart, the Squirrel Queen looks upon the sudden passing of "Enron King" Ken Lay shortly before he was to be sentenced for his multi-million $$$$ crimes with a skeptical eye.
Sure he's been convicted of fraud and conspiracy, but this man has old-moneyed friends in high places.
I'm guessing they're pulling off some kind of Elvis "The King" Presley type of fake death so he can take on a new life in the Halliburton Witness Protection Program (HWPP).
While the "living" Elvis has been spotted in diners and truck stops from Kansas to Michigan, the new Lay persona will attend Halliburton board meetings and spend relaxing weekends at Camp David tossing around a baseball with Dumbya. Heck, they may even trek down to Houston to the formerly-named Enron Field to catch an Astros game. While they're in Texas, they might head over to Dallas and take a drive around Dealey Plaza, site of another conspiracy.
Back in Washington, the former Enron King will be whispering in the ear of Darth Cheney, offering business advice on how to handle his volumes of Halliburton stock. He'll be putting pen to paper and writing no-bid contracts for the huge greedy corporation which the Pentagon will quickly sign and then black out in the next gakamazillion dollar budget they release.
So if anyone spots a new face hanging around the halls of the White House, let me know. Break out a camera phone and capture the newest member in the HWPP and create a successor to the Zapruder film.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Barf bag a gogo

It appears anything and everything is now considered collectible no matter how little its actual value. Working on my previous post allowed me to discover a web site devoted solely to a collection of barg bags. The bags in my previous post's image are two sides of one bag from Yeti Airways.
I'm not making that up. The company's logo includes a big footprint inside a circle while the vomiting woman is on the opposite side of the bag.

A bag worthy of containing recycled jalapenos if I've ever seen one.
If you visit the link, check out the movie promotional bags and the political protest bags. Also, in the airline section, scroll down to Virgin Airlines Chunky style bags. They've got artsy and funky cartoons like the one at left on them to take your mind off your misery while your filling them up.
Always remember to Fly the Friendly Yeti Skies. The airline that should always offers complimentary copies of the Weekly World News to its passengers.
Apparently before the Yeti got his pilot's license and his wings, the big hairy fellow was tearing around a race track in New York behind the wheel of a stock car according to WWN.
Vroom, vroom.

Nacho average ride home

Had a roadtrip this weekend.
I won tickets to see the St. Louis Cardinals take on the Braves in Hotlanta Monday night.
Newscoma and I took off Sunday morning and decided to stay in Chattanooga since it would give us a headstart on coming home on the Fourth.
Saw Pujols swat a double and a home run. Saw Smoltz work out of jams.
Drank beer. Took pictures of Newscoma with Johnny Bravo. Ate a hot dog (the actual frank was fine but at Turner Field they serve it on an entire loaf of bread instead of an average bun. It was similar to a hoagy bun. Way too much bread) and later, against the advice of Newscoma, ate a load of nachos smothered in jalapenos. I don't normally partake of the green, heat-producing slivers, usually just the orange gooey cheese. But I thought what the heck, I'm at the ball park.
Go for it.
Cards were losing and didn't look like they were going to recover and we had to drive back to Chattanooga so we took off after the end of the seventh. Normally I would protest the early departure, but I thought it just made sense this time.
I had developed a headache I attributed to the heat. Once in the car, over the counter medication eliminated the throb from my frontal lobe and kept my right eyeball from exploding out of its socket and splattering on the inside of the windshield.
I thought I'd feel better, but the intense headache was only masking my other symptoms - extreme nausea.
Once the headache departed, I could now focus solely on the tsunami waves rumbling from my inner core and working their way up my gullet and down through my colon. Now instead of perspiring from the 90+ degree heat of an Atlanta afternoon and evening, I was sweating despite the auto's air conditioning cranked to the max.
Trying to be a trooper, I drove for a while before I finally conceded and allowed Newscoma behind the wheel. I thought it would be better out of the driver's seat, but once in the passenger's area, I now had nothing to focus on other than my intestinal misery.
Before we made it back to our hotel room, I pleaded with Newscoma to pull over to the side.
Door opens. Projectile yakking ensues. Jalapenos and hot dogs rapidly evacuate the Squirrel Queen's gastrointestinal trac.
A word to the uninitiated. If you think jalapenos can burn your lips and tongue on the way in, just imagine another bout with them after they've stewed in hot, steaming gastric acid and are charging like the cavalry up your throat, back across your tongue and over your fever-parched lips.
That burning sensation sticks with you for a while, no matter how much water you swish around in your mouth.
It was my only purging, but I was nauseous the rest of the way home and considered requesting another visit to the breakdown lane on more than one occasion. The waves receded, each time leaving a tidal pool of gastric juices bubbling much too close to the surface.
Newscoma navigated us back to our temporary home where I immediately konked out despite a bout with chills.
After sleeping like the dead, this morning I awoke fearing a continuation, but felt fine.
Unfortunately, my traveling companion Newscoma had now been bitten by the bug that way-layed me the night before.
The good news is the bug's evil life span apparently covers only a few hours before the recovery process begins and we still managed to leave Chattanooga by mid morning.
Don't let this post fool you. It was a great trip. Good to get away.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Porcupine 1, Dog 0

Ran across this pic on the Internet while surfing for something else. It's not some "alien" from another crappy SciFi flick. It's a dog who lost a run-in with a porcupine.

Apparently this canine pin cushion pic has circulated some via e-mail since it happened, but it never made its way into my in-box.

Thought I'd share it with those of you who've not seen it before.

I used to have a white Staffordshire Bull Terrier like this one. She, if in the right or wrong mood depending on how you look at it, would have tangled with a herd of porcupines. Best dog I ever had.

The pain must have been excruciating. I know from experience these dogs can be "hard headed," but apparently not enough to deter a quill. Makes me wonder if the porcupine is now naked.